Well.

It's now been exactly 4 months since the suicide of my beloved cousin PD. To say I miss him is too simple. I ache with regret and guilt and sorrow for all I could have should have done, and for his mom and sister left behind. I ache for the whole fam damly; all eleventy billion of us. We are lucky to have such a ginormous and close family...but at the same time, I spend too much time wondering WHO IS NEXT.


Odds are it will be my sister A. Who is right this very moment in the ICU. 


The littles need me...so I will continue later.